I listen to the gentle murmuring voice
Of our city, awake despite the hour
And I linger, unwilling to return
To the television world inside — droolingmonkey

Friday, December 01, 2006

Long Hard week

Thank goodness the weekend is almost here.Its been a shit of a week.Its rained cold and sleety..its cold for summer and Ive had some argueing with someone very close to me.Im feeling quite insecure and unsafe... (dont know if they are the right words or not)..My James is still wonderful and supportive and kind and still folds the laundry;) My Jacob still does my shopping and whistles as he walks through the door..The nurses are kind and understanding.But I am at a shaky place.A place where I need some re assureance about something important to me,and the persons not willing to give it.Ive been trying to plan my future..but I cant! And I know its silly to try and take care of things.All I can do now is live one day at a time..loving and caring for James.What I need really doesnt matter.All that is important is him.He is trying to help me and we have most things set in place,legally and in truth.Im being a worrier and I hate it!!!

posted by butterflies @ 10:27 AM

6 Comments:

At 11:44 AM, Blogger sleeplessinoklahoma said...

Oh, hon I am sooo sorry!! It seems this is sometimes a part of the process. Mom & I had some hellacious arguments near the end. We just both needed things the other could not give...so we fought. Mostly I argued with her & said horrible things. True things but horrible. I know how hard it is to want everything settled when they just can't all be so. Somethings will just have to be settled later. It sucks!! Just stay true to yourself, James, & what you two want. That is all that matters. Everything else will fall into its proper place at the proper time. I am so sorry you are not feeling safe...I still have those moments sometimes. It is hard to be alone. But, it is do-able with friends & family. For me friends are my best support & help. Family is just weird for me, as you know. Dave was my family, the one I trusted. Hang in there. I am here. I love you & will help anyway I can.

Take care dearest sister-friend. Hugs to you & James.

Blessed be...

 
At 1:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks D..I will always stay true to myself..Im amazed how you always know me and even who the arguement was with!
I have wonderful friends and they are my mainstay,my rocks and my very foundation.
I know that things will fall into place somehow,but I need something..and its only words,that Im not able to have at this time.
I love you too sisterfriend..
Butterflies

 
At 3:42 PM, Blogger Mimi said...

I am a worrier too and it is awful! It makes me sick sometimes, literally. The funny thing is the things I worry about never happen. As always you are in my prayers!

 
At 2:34 AM, Blogger UKBob said...

Hi, I'm sorry to hear that you are having some problems, I'm not sure what they all are as I have only just visited your blog and don't have much time to got too far back at the moment. I know from experience that when things aren't going well it's hard to see how they can get better, usually they eventually do though. Its hard to know what to do about people, I guess thats why I like my dogs so much. Thanks for visiting my blog you are always welcome to visit anytime.

 
At 6:41 AM, Blogger Chana said...

hello angel. fighting sucks. words that pierce the heart can leave scars that take too long to heal if ever. i'm sorry, for it seems, that when we need the most support and the most comfort, when we are the most vulnerable is when we are hurt by the ones that should take care of us the most. it doesn't always happen this way of course, but the times it does, sting like heck.

i hope peace can come to your heart and to all that surround you. you are all in need of each other now more than ever and love should always find a way. priorities are such that i hope 'that person' can see past her own feelings and be there for you. it is often hard but love is nothing but that sometimes and it is worth all of it.

good luck my angel. may God touch you with His love and grace and peace and comfort.

 
At 12:45 AM, Blogger salim said...

Greating from Oman.
Life is short

 

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