I listen to the gentle murmuring voice
Of our city, awake despite the hour
And I linger, unwilling to return
To the television world inside — droolingmonkey

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

A Very Good Year

Its almost Christmas time again..another year has passed.Yesterday one of the hospice nurses said to me "oh youve had a hard year" but I replied "no its been wonderful"...she looked at me a bit as if I was mad..
But it HAS been a great year.Yes,its been full of ups and downs but thats just life.Its been amazing.Me and James have gotten through another year together.My son has come home,at least to rest his tired bones and recoup,my mother got her new house,the kid got safely to her sisters home,the weather has been good and our money lasts from the beginning of the mth to the end;)(just)
I have met some beautiful new blogger friends.These ppl come over to say hi,leave wonderful comments that even in my darkest hours,will give me such a feeling of being loved..And me and Chana have even corresponded snail mail also..heh
I realsied that its so much easier to see bad things than good.I hate it when Im negative and all I want is to see and live the goodness..in the light.James is one of the most positive ppl Ive ever met.He never gets down! Never! When we were told he had cancer,he said,it could be worse....
I was in complete agreement with him about not having any treatment and in fact hospice even say that hes lived this long because he didnt have treatment which is full of toxins and poisons..Weve dont the right thing and have no regrets.Its all good...
Yesterday we recieved a huge food parcel! We were nominated by the Melville Methodist church and the main church in town delivered it from their food bank.
It was filled with chocolates for the kids,lots of can foods,xmas mince pies,plum puddings,chippies and dips,and all kinds of yummy things.I would never have bought any of these things and now it will be nice to share them with friends who call in.
James sister sent him a date loaf ..hand baked and all the way from California:)
The emphasis seems to be on food at xmas..a turkey,a leg of lamb,a leg of ham(thanks Mum) and heaps of salads.
Today I will put up some lights,gentle little ones that twinkle.Im putting them around the window by James lounge bed.We can lie together under them and feel Christmasy...Theres no room in the cottage for a tree so lights will have to do..Ive made a collage photo board with all our favourite pics from our life together in OKC.
Its happy loving memories.Im so happy.I have my lover and hes kind and good to me.
He still sees beauty.Id like to be playing some carols when Jake comes over(cos he hates them;)
My tomato plants are thigh high covered in fruit..yesterday I planted statice,begonias and more sunflowers for James.Im so pleased with my garden.The "remember me" rose is stunning!Its got burnt orange flower buds all over it and my "sunny hunny" is pale orange also covered in buds.What could be better?

posted by butterflies @ 10:18 AM


At 2:55 PM, Blogger Polar Bear said...

What could be better, indeed! I'm so glad that you have been so well looked after. Glad you will have nice food to share around. Happy for you and James to have seen this year.

Let's celebrate the coming of next year - a year of hope and promise, a year where things could be even better. You've been such a positive force in my life, B, and I want to thank you.

Have a great holiday. Enjoy every moment.

Polar B.

At 2:53 AM, Blogger Chana said...

every moment i have spent with you, has made it to another blessing to be grateful for. no matter where we are, how we connect, how much space or time is between us, i hold you dear to my heart and you are never far away. i love you and James. i admire you both and i feel honored to have met you both and have a front seat to this beautiful love story.

not many would be able to have the attitude of either of you. not many, could hold their heads up so well. i watch in amazement and with pride to both of you.

it has been a great year for many of us, for we have met you both.


always with you.

At 3:09 AM, Blogger sleeplessinoklahoma said...

What a beautiful post!! So full of love...just as your life with James. I love you both so much! You have had a wonderful year. I believe in the face of a terminal illness attitude is everything. James' fight attests to this. The doctors in OKC would be amazed. I am just so happy for you both. Another year of love...another year of life lived fully with faith in God, love for each other, care & compassion for others. You are truly inspirational. You are my family...my tribe.
Merry, Merry Christmas!!

Blessed be...

At 2:32 PM, Blogger Dr.John said...

You fogged my glasses again. A love like yours is so special I doubt that many people ever find it. It is good taht you can see the blessing in the middle of the pain. May God continue to touch you.

At 3:10 AM, Blogger for what it's worth said...

What a joyous year indeed! The time and memories that you have created are not only the things that hope is made of, but they are the expression of love in it's purest form. No pretenses, no false platitudes, just love.
The doctor's would be amazed indeed. Even medicine doesn't have close to the power that love and devotion do
What a year indeed!
God Bless you both!

At 6:27 PM, Blogger Chana said...

Merry Christmas to you and James and to all of your family. God Bless both. i love you both. XO


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